Psychology 201

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PSYCHOLOGY 201

A month of two ago, one of my friends offered to loan me his Troy Bilt tiller and I told him I appreciated the offer but had to decline.  I didn't go into the reasons why I try not to borrow tools and equipment but later gave some reasons as to why I don't which parallels my reasoning for not loaning things either.  When borrowing as with loaning items, inevitably something will break, malfunction or go wrong bringing Murphy's Law into immediate action.  However, I do loan tools and things out once in a blue moon to someone that I absolutely know is trustworthy.

PSYCHOLOGY BACKGROUND

Many decades ago; 1975 thru 1978 while attending a Technical Institute and Community College part time to take advantage of my military GI benefits and increase my knowledge base, I had the opportunity to take a few courses in psychology and human behavior studying the writings of psychiatrist, psychologist, etc., of  Sigmund Freud, B. F. Skinner, Abram Maslow, William James and Carl Jung, just to name a few.  In my humble opinion, I still believe Sigmund Freud to be somewhat crazy although he is considered the Father of Psychiatry.  A good portion of his analytical work is flawed in my humble opinion; e.g., studying insane people to arrive at sane conclusions, etc.  Some of those psychiatrist and psychologist studies and experiments have set standards that would make a lunatic seem sane today or a sane person appear to be crazy.  Lawyers certainly do utilize those theories and studies to the maximum to benefit their clients attempting to circumvent justice......grin if you must.  My favorite psychiatrist would be Carl Jung.  Nevertheless, those psychology courses were a valuable asset to have in my mental toolbox for working in a prison environment for thirty-three (33) years and dealing with all sorts of individuals that take self rationalization and con games to new heights.  I must confess that I did exploit some of those psychological concepts learned to my advantage for dealing with upper level management and most importantly, dealing with convicts aka inmates.  Convicts use similar techniques for manipulating custody and program staff members relying on human emotions such as; empathy, sympathy, pity, compassion, benevolence, kindness, etc., and hopefully they haven't progressed to Psychology 301 which is wishful thinking on my part!

CONVICTS AKA INMATES THREE BASIC WANTS

The majority of convicts has three basic wants other than the basic needs provided by the Correctional Facilities: Drugs, Sex, Money and will do whatever it takes to acquire them.  This assessment didn't come from a seminar, classroom or text book but personal observation over three decades within the prison environment!

I didn't get side tracked too bad but did venture out into left field just a little and now back to why I try not to borrow or loan anything.  Below is a copy and paste of some of the experiences over the decades for putting a few extra wrinkles or folds in my brain relating to loaning things.  Every once in a while, something will trigger an experience from the past as it relates to loaning things but most of the time it is soon forgotten and I guess that is a good thing too! 

GOING BACK IN TIME TO THE 1970s

The above Greenlee 3/4 inch diameter hole punch along with a Greenlee 1/2 inch diameter hole punch was loaned out to a local ham radio operator back in the 1970s and it took nearly thirty (30) years, maybe longer asking him to return them without success.  I finally embarrassed him in front Bill Donathan, proprietor of Smith's Cleaners one day while picking up some clothes and followed the dude home across town and took possession of my hole punches.  He had no trouble finding the hole punches and knew exactly where they were.  He did not have any intention of ever returning those hole punches.  I have had very bad luck over the decades loaning out tools and various things of which many I never got back loaned out as early as 1964 being a set of York barbells, dumbbells, extra 45 lb. weights  and received all kind of excuses as to their current whereabouts.  I still remember two animal live traps, steel jaw traps, trapping books and manuals, archery and knife making books, post hole diggers, short handle shovel, car jack, charger for metal detector, etc., that have acquired new homes never to return.....grin if you must!  I loaned a DeVILBISS EGA-502 spray gun out and when I finally got it back, the threads for the air gage and/or air fitting were badly stripped out and had to replace the spray gun.  I had a "friend" store a 400 pound +- Universal brand commercial food mixer in his out building/barn before 1989 and when I went to get the heavy mixer years later, he could not find it in the barn.....imagine that!  It took both of us to load and unload the large floor model mixer using an incline wood ramp.  I observed a near identical food mixer in a fire department kitchen that the guy was a member of and that could very well be where it ended up.  That was the end of that friendship as far as I was concerned.  It took over fifteen (15) years to get a fly fishing book back from one of my cousins, (now deceased) and was badly worn with water stains.  The above are some of the things I remember and I am sure there are others.  Family and friends are the culprits because I doubt you would loan something to a stranger!  You can also use the same analogy when loaning aka giving away money!  "Experience is a tough teacher but the lessons learned stay with you forever."  I got a chance to vent and that is a good thing to do every once in a while without getting belligerent and bellicose; I had much rather grin instead!

TRADES GONE AMISS

I remember a couple trades back in the mid 1970s when I had my musical repair parts and accessories mail order business and did a set of inlays for a well known musician and banjo builder in the Eastern Panhandle of West Virginia.  He was pleased with the inlays and offered to trade a piece of curly maple wood for another set of abalone inlays.  I shipped the inlays and never got the curly maple banjo neck wood and he never responded to my letters or telephone calls.  He has been dead quite a number of years but his legacy still lives on.  Also, there was an individual in Narrows, Virginia that did some excellent machine shop work for one of my friends in Athens, West Virginia and was highly recommended.  I had my friend trade him 300 dollars worth of parts and/or banjo inlaid fingerboard and pegheads that I left with him who delivered the items to trade for him to lathe turn a stainless steel drill fixture for the Gibson pre-war tube.  I never got the drill fixture, however my friend offered to pay for what his friend did not deliver but I told him "No", it was the other persons responsibility.  There are many dishonest people and sooner or later you will get some experience from dealing with them!  I still have that archived unpaid invoice dated 06-03-76 in my friends file from West Virginia of which I sent the invoice to the person that lived on Rowland Street there in Narrows, Virginia which was a wasted postal stamp.

Within the past eight (8) years, I sent a field grade custom turkey box call to a man in California of whom I only contacted via email and telephone calls.  I was impressed with his ability to use a box call and he agreed to do me a video of him using my call to replicate the various sounds of the wild turkey.  He liked the call very much, however as of this date, I never received my video tape but received all kind of excuses and finally lost contact with the crook and thief since he moved on to snag another blue fin sucker. 

Leaving this paragraph on a positive note, I have friends that I have loaned things to and received them back in a timely manner but that is the exception to the rule and I certainly do respect individuals of that moral character and fiber.  I have made many verbal trades over the years via telephone from coast to coast depending upon the integrity of the other party and ninety-nine (99) percent of the time, everything went well.

THE BEST 35 DOLLAR INVESTMENT TO DATE

One of the best investments I made in the early to mid 1970s was repairing a fellow musician's Gibson flat top guitar, replacing the bridge.  After the repair and receiving only partial payment, he still owed me about 35 dollars, not exactly sure of the amount but think I am correct.  Before finishing this investment story, I played Dobro guitar with his part-time band and one Sunday, the guy showed up with a couple car loads of the band members and their families unannounced and stayed the entire day.  I believe my bride used up a weeks worth of groceries trying to feed the hungry crowd and there were several young kids with them too.  Their kids tore up our son's favorite music box and had our kids toys strewn out in the back yard and field.  

After that infamous visit is when I did the guitar repair for the band leader.  I was still working with the NC Telephone Company and when I would have to travel to Matthews, NC for something job related, I would stop by his home and small antique business in Waxhaw, NC and before I would get to their front door, I could see the curtains move and knew that someone was home and his station wagon was also in the driveway, however he never came to the front door!

I never saw the guy after that guitar repair and that is one of the best 35 dollar investments I have ever made.  I also loaned them several LP vinyl Bluegrass albums and forgot about those until now!

In conclusion, the above short story is a synopsis of why I don't loan or borrow anything if it can be avoided.

LEAVING ON A SPIRITUAL NOTE

Below is one of the "Golden Rules" of the Bible:

Matthew 7:12 - Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.

Web published by Bill aka Mickey Porter on 09-11-16.

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